Rhonda Shasteen

Reflections is "under construction"

admin — Fri, 30 Apr 2010 20:23:00 GMT

With Rhonda's retirement, the Reflections blog has found a new home, and will be under construction for a short while. Stay tuned for exciting new content, new authors and more coming soon!

Parting Words and Special Thanks

admin — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 18:56:00 GMT

I can’t believe it’s been 26 years. I’ve enjoyed more than half of my life here in the Mary Kay pink bubble.

I came here in 1984 for a job, a paycheck to help with the family bills. I never imagined the impact it would have on my life. I have been incredibly blessed during these years to be surrounded by some of the most amazing people and business leaders, like Mary Kay and Richard Rogers, David Holl and our executive team, and the Mary Kay employees and members of our sales force. From them, I’ve learned such valuable lessons about business, about dealing with people and about life. Along the way what I learned most about was …me. One of those lessons that I learned was to follow my heart.

There were so many times during my career where my heart was saying “your work here is done, there’s something new for you to do”. Each time I listened and followed, it led me to an exciting new position at Mary Kay where I could grow and contribute in new ways.

A couple of years ago, I began to get that familiar feeling once again. I argued with it for quite a while, but finally last June, I decided once again I had to listen to what my heart was saying, it had always been right before. This time was different though, because this time it was leading me beyond the doors of Mary Kay. I love this company and what I do here, and I would never leave to go work 40 hours a week for someone else. But life is calling me to other things. I’m not much of a planner, but more of a take it as it comes sort of person, so I can’t say definitively what I’ll be doing. My thoughts so far are around spending more time with Van at the farm, volunteering more, developing up-and-coming executives, continuing to blog, possibly writing a book and getting involved in politics.

Alex Haley said “Anytime you see a turtle on top of a fence post, you know he had some help.” Well, just like the turtle, I have had a lot of help. So many special people have impacted and influenced me in ways big and small, and so I must thank a few who were instrumental in shaping my career and the person I have become.

First of all, I thank God, for blessing me beyond measure and having a better plan for me than I had for myself.

Mom and Dad – for raising me up with a strong sense of personal responsibility and accountability and teaching me to always do the right thing

My husband and children – for their love and support all along the way, and the many sacrifices that they had to make so that I could do what I needed to do for Mary Kay and for me

Mary Kay Ash and Richard Rogers– for creating this amazing company, setting a tremendous example of Golden Rule leadership and giving me a safe place to take off my training wheels and go to places I never imagined going.

Betty Bessler – for hiring me in 1984

Connie White and *** Bartlett – for taking a chance on me in marketing

The economy in 1985 – for leading to a Mary Kay hiring freeze and the elimination of my new marketing job. I thought it was the end and it turned out to be the beginning of something big.

Dennis Greaney – for teaching me a lot about products, packaging, manufacturing and the supply chain in my early years in marketing

Gary Jinks – for helping me to learn the sales side of Mary Kay and understand what really drives this business

Tom Whatley – for challenging me more than I had ever been challenged before, and for letting me get involved in everything I wanted to get involved with. He also finally taught me that timing is everything.

Myra Barker – for helping me to smooth out some rough edges that I needed to fix on my way to the executive team. She was tougher on me than any boss I ever had, but I grew a lot and I know that her intentions were 100% focused on helping me to be successful.

David Holl – for giving me the opportunity to be a part of the executive team and for always being willing to listen when I needed to say something. I’m certain there were and still are times when he didn’t want to hear it, but he listened patiently anyway.

Sheryl Adkins-Green, Peggy Davidson, Yvette Franco and Patricia Wanderley – amazing women and great leaders in their own right, for making it easy to be their leader. In working with them, I saw very quickly that all I needed to do was to paint the picture and then get out of their way, occasionally moving an obstacle for them or just be a willing ear when they needed one. I feel very confident leaving things in their very capable hands.

And my assistant, Barbara Bomar – Barb has been with me for more than 10 years. She is such an incredible person, and leaves an indelible mark on everyone that has passed through my office all these years. Sometimes I think she knows me better than I know myself. Not only has she kept things running smoothly for me and the entire division, she has been a dear friend and I appreciate her loyalty and service to me more than I am able to put into words.

Now, anyone who knows me well knows that I never let an opportunity for learning pass by, so here are just a few bits of wisdom that I figured out along the way.

In honor of Mary Kay, here are the "6 most important things" I think you need to do to be successful as a leader.

A deep understanding of people. When you are in a leadership role, things no longer get done because you do them. Your success is the culmination of the success of others on your team. The ability to get along with others, up, down and across; understanding why they do what they do and how to inspire them are critical success factors.
Excellent communication skills, and the ability to adapt them to the context of the situation. One-on-one, to a group, good news, bad news, up, down and across. Not only knowing how to communicate, but WHAT to communicate to WHO, and WHY.
The mindset to get yourself out of the way. I’ve seen so many people become stuck in their career path because everything revolves around them. Every decision the company makes is about '"them", the meeting that’s being held down the hall certainly should include "them", the bosses door is shut so she must be talking about "them". You know these people (or maybe it's you!). Everyone else is getting promoted, and they aren’t, and they don’t understand why. Get out of yourself and get into others, and things will begin to happen for you.
Get comfortable with conflict. You don’t have to like it, but you do have to confront it and resolve it. It is never as bad as you imagine it in your mind to be. And the more you do it, the more comfortable with it you will become.
The courage to speak the truth, even when it’s difficult. Whether it’s pointing out to your colleagues the elephant in the room, giving feedback to a direct report, or admitting when you’ve made a mistake, people won’t follow you if they don’t trust you, and that trust is earned from a visible pattern of honesty and integrity.
Release your control issues. Bill Cosby said “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.” I became much more effective when I finally learned to release what I couldn’t control and focus exclusively on the things that I could control. The first thing I had to figure out was what I did have control over, which is not much. It’s really quite simple, but is one of the biggest factors holding people back, and causes great stress and frustration. So here’s the secret: You can only control 3 things: your thoughts, your words, and your actions. Everything else is out of your hands. Other people are going to think what they’re going to think, say what they want to say, and do what they want to do, in spite of your best efforts to sway them. The best you can hope for is to influence them through your words and actions. But at the end of the day, it’s up to them. Accept it, and release that which you can’t control. You will sleep much better at night and will be much happier as you continue on your journey that is called life.

One of my favorite quotes is from Steve Jobs of Apple. He says, “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

I am grateful to each of you for the role you play in keeping Mary Kay’s dream alive, and I look forward to watching you as you continue to grow toward the 50^th anniversary and beyond. May God bless you all.

Mary Kay Celebrates International Women's Day on March 8

admin — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 17:06:00 GMT

For several years, Mary Kay Russia has led the way within Mary Kay in celebrating International Women's Day. This year, many of our subsidiaries in Europe, Latin America and Asia/Pacific as well as the United States will also celebrate the holiday created to honor the economic, political and social achievements of women. While the holiday is one of the most important in Russia and widely celebrated in several countries, it's relatively unknown in others.

Did You Know?

International Women’s Day has been observed for 100 years. It’s considered the biggest celebration in Russia next to Christmas.
International Women's Day was honored the first time in Austria, Denmark, Germany and Switzerland in 1911.
At the first celebration, more than one million women and men attended International Women's Day rallies campaigning for women's rights to work, vote, be trained, to hold public office and end discrimination.
It’s celebrated the same as Valentine’s Day and Mother's Day in the U.S. with men honoring their mothers, wives, girlfriends, female colleagues, etc … with flowers, candy and perfume.
The day celebrates the achievements of all women around the world.
International Women's Day is an official holiday in 14 countries, including Kazakhstan, Moldova, Russia and Ukraine.
2011 is International Women’s Day’s Global Centenary (1911-2011).
As a result of this global celebration, The United States designates March as 'Women's History Month.'

Join Mary Kay Inc. today in celebrating all that women have contributed to our world. Tell a woman just how great you think she is!

First Annual Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month

admin — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 20:44:00 GMT

February has been named Teen Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention month. Previously it was only recognized for one week. I hope that moving from one week to one month serves to better spread the awareness of an issue that faces too many of our young people today.

Mary Kay Inc. and the Mary Kay Foundation have a long-standing commitment to bring an end to domestic violence, and we became active in 2009 in the teen dating violence area. We've partnered with the non-profit group Break the Cycle to sponsor an interactive DVD called Ending Violence that can be easily used by school systems throughout our nation. Ending Violence helps to teach middle and high school students about healthy relationships and dating violence. Currently, one in three teens will experience abuse in a dating relationship and one in four eighth and ninth grade students report being victims of dating violence. We hope that by raising awareness in young people we can reduce or eradicate that number. You can see a sneak peek of the DVD program here:

While the creation of the Ending Violence program was a great start, it will only work if we get it in front of as many middle and high school students as possible. Here's where you can help. Currently, Oklahoma, Texas and Rhode Island are the only states that require domestic violence education programs in schools. You can do your part and demonstrate your support for this teen dating violence curriculum in our schools by signing the petition at www.enddatingviolence.com.

I encourage you to learn more about the Ending Violence program, and all the wonderful work that Break The Cycle does as the leading voice for teens on the issue of dating violence. Visit www.breakthecycle.org, and talk to a young person you know about this issue. By working together, we can make a difference.

Yes, It's True

admin — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 16:26:00 GMT

If you read the comments to my previous post "Wishes for the New Year" you will gather that I will be retiring from Mary Kay Inc. I'll be here until April 30, and will continue to blog until then. I am working on "willing" the Reflections blog to another women here at the company that will feel as passionate about it as I do. I'll share additional thoughts on retirement as the day draws nearer, but in the meantime I did want to acknolwedge the comments from our readers and thank them for their kind words and well wishes.

Wishes for the New Year

admin — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 21:03:00 GMT

I'm having a hard time believing that 2009 has come to an end, and that means it is time to work on goals and dreams for 2010. I haven't yet created my own personal goals for the new year, but I do have a few things I've been thinking of that I would wish for others, more specifically, other women.

Ten things that I would wish for all Women in 2010

1. That you respect and love yourself

2. That you are loved and respected by others

3. That you discover the personal freedom that comes when you are controlling the things you can, and letting go of the things you can't

4. That you free yourself from the burden of debt

5. That each day you learn something new

6. That what is important to you is clear

7. That you are able to invest your time in what is important to you

8. That you can reconcile anything that is keeping you from moving forward

9. That you will have the courage to always speak the truth, even when it's not easy

10. That you will find true happiness

May 2010 bring you great joy, many new discoveries, and may you move one step closer to becoming the woman you were meant to be!

Seeing things differently

admin — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 17:17:00 GMT

It was snowing this morning in Dallas, which is quite unusual for us this time of year. If we get any at all, it's mostly in January or February. With the dense cloud cover, everything in the house was a little darker than normal when I got up to get ready for the office. I pulled out a new pair of black and white tweed pants to wear, with a solid black jacket and my black boots. I thought it was the perfect outfit for a cold and snowy day. As I do each morning, I took a last minute glance in the bathroom mirror to make certain that everything was in its place before I walked out the door for my morning commute.

As I was driving across town in the car, now outside in the daylight, suddenly the black and white tweed pants began to mysteriously change to brown and white. How could that be? I tried to remember back to when I purchased the pants, wondering if I had intended to buy black and white or brown and white. What color did I think I was buying? I couldn't remember, but unconciously this morning, they were definitely black and white. As I continued the drive in, I had convinved myself that it was simply a reflection of the tan interior in my car that was casting the brown color on my black and white tweed pants. Still, I wasn't completely sure.

When I arrived at the Mary Kay building, I went straight to the ladies room to settle the matter once and for all, only to find out that my black and white tweed pants had a brown zipper and brown lining! Alas, yes, I fear I have gone out in public today wearing a black jacket, black boots and brown and white tweed pants. I have many outfits that very effectively mix brown and black for a fashionable look, but I don't think I'd put this one in that category. Oh, well.

So here's what it made me think about. Just as my pants looked diffferent in different lighting conditions, so do our behaviors and the things that happen to us in life. Context is a huge factor in how we perceive things, and how others perceive our words and actions. What seems right in one situation might turn out badly in a different situation. Always be considerate of the context. Take the time to look around, and think about what is going on, before you act.

P.S. I was very tempted to wait until tomorrow to post this blog, thinking the fewer people that saw me today the better. I'm not a celebrity, so the chances of my error in judgment winding up in the tabloids is slim to none, but I've seen too many examples recently that prove if you don't fess up, someone else will do it for you and then you have a lot of explaining to do. So, I decided to go ahead and face it. Not to mention the fact that it gave me a great analogy to talk about the importance of context.

Brand "You"

admin — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 22:24:00 GMT

I've heard it said many times over the years that "people don't join companies, they join people" and likewise, "people don't leave companies, they leave people." I think this is true to a great extent.

An example of this is when Mary Kay Ash founded our company on Friday, September 13th, 1963. There was no "company" that she could share. The story hadn't been written yet. There was no brand, no product success, no past sales history that would provide the confidence or the impetus to join her. There was only her, her 20 year old son, Richard, and a shelf full of pink jars in a small rented space in an office complex. Yet, join they did. Women signed up based on "brand Mary Kay Ash", the person.

I don't believe much has changed since then in this aspect. Certainly our company's rich history and success over the past 46 years, our quality products that continue to be among women's favorites and our world famous founder provide a context for women today who are looking for great beauty products or a business opportunity. However, women today still buy our products and decide to begin a business because they like the Independent Beauty Consultant who has connected with them, helped them with their product needs and become a trusted advisor.

It's interesting that in today's times, so many things have become much less personal, but at the same time, the importance of the personal relationship in many businesses is becoming increasingly important.

No matter what business you're in, "brand You" may be the most important brand of all. Have you taken the time to define your brand, and how you show it to the people that you want to do business with. Are they buying what you're selling? If not, perhaps it's not the company you represent or the product you sell, perhaps it's YOU that they aren't buying.

Plan your work, and work your plan

admin — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 18:05:00 GMT

It's planning and budgeting time around the Mary Kay office right now. That means we're all thinking about our most important initiatives for 2010, our revenue forecasts for all of our markets around the world, and what we think we'll be spending to accomplish our goals. It's a process that goes on for a few months each year. We each begin at the individual department level, but eventually all have to come together to make sure that our goals are in sync overall and that our company-wide budget is reasonable. No one particularly enjoys the process, but everyone understands how important it is to plan.

As I was thinking about this, I was reminded about two things: (1) Mary Kay Ash always said that one should "plan your work, and work your plan", and (2) that many young women these days don't have a plan for their life, but wish they did (as we learned from our 2009 What Women Want research study). It occurred to me that as individuals, we don't often take the time to plan for our year with the careful thought and discipline that we put into the planning process for our jobs. I wonder what would happen if we did? What if we all practiced "plan your life, and live your plan"?

I've decided that I'm going to give it a try and see what happens. Instead of making the usual New Year's resolutions, which quickly fall by the wayside, I'm actually going to sit down with my husband this year and craft a plan for 2010 for our personal life. I'd like the plan to include what we want to accomplish next year, collectively and individually. What do we expect our income to be? How much will our living expenses be, and how much discretionary spending should we plan based on what we want to do? I'd like to set a goal for a certain number of hours of volunteer time, and a financial plan for our charitable giving. This would really be a big step for us, as we typically take life one day or one week, or one month at a time, as most people do. We are blessed at this point in our lives, in not having to live from paycheck to paycheck, but the idea of actually planning a budget and sticking to it is kind of exciting for me. Just like we do at the office, we can sit down and review our progress each quarter, see where we've stayed on track and where we can improve. And it will be fun to look back at the end of the year and see how many of our goals we actually met. I can imagine that having this plan would make all the daily decisions we face that much easier, because we would have a "filter" of sorts to weigh the decision against. If we do "X", is it consistent with the goals we set? If not, are we willing to change our goals?

Of course I know that things will come up along the way that will get us sidetracked, they always do -- those little, or sometimes BIG, things that are out of our control and come up at the most inopportune times. But it would seem that, other than those times, the peace of mind in knowing where we were going and how we wanted to get there would bring a tremendous sense of freedom and independence, leaving far fewer things to clutter our minds each and every day.

If you've been disciplined about planning your personal life this way, I'd love to hear about it. How did it work for you? What did it feel like?

Let me introduce you...

admin — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 16:15:00 GMT

to Anne Crews. Anne is our first guest blogger here on Reflections, and I'm so delighted she agreed to share with our readers this month. October is Domestic Violence Awareness month, and Anne is a Mary Kay warrior when it comes to her commitment to personally do all she can to put a stop to this dreadful thing that plagues so many of our families. All of us at Mary Kay are very proud of the work we doin this area. It takes a lot of money to make a difference all across our country and all around our world, and none of it would be possible without our wonderful independent sales force and their loyal customers. Through their purchases of our skin care and color cosmetics, as well as their generous donations to the Mary Kay Foundation, all this is possible. We owe them a great deal of gratitude, and hope that they are as proud as we are of the work that has been done to help enrich the lives of women in need.

I invite you to click on the link below to hear directly from Mary Kay's resident warrior on the domestic violence front, Anne Crews.

http://reflections.marykay.com/crews/archive/2009/10/02/pink-changing-lives-part-one.aspx

When things don't go your way

admin — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 21:09:00 GMT

I saw a great quote on Twitter yesterday. Unfortunately, an author wasn't cited, so I don't know who to attribute it to, but it really got me to thinking about what happens to us when things don't go our way.

"Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted"

If that is true, which I believe it is, then I know without a doubt that Mary Kay Ash would have said that she had lots of "experience"! For example, when she was a salesperson herself (before founding our company), she had set her sights on winning a beautiful handbag that she had seen a previous sales leader earn. She set that as her goal, and worked hard all year long to earn one for herself. She achieved the level of sales required, but she didn't get what she wanted. Instead, she was rewarded with a flounder light (evidently it's something you use to attract fish when you're trying to catch them). From that experience, she decided that if she ever got the chance to award prizes to other sales women, they would be the kind of Cinderella prizes that women really wanted, like that original handbag that she wanted. And that is exactly what she did, and we still do today.

I often Heard Mary Kay say that "If we ever decide to compare knees, you're going to find that I have more scars than anyone in the room. That's because I have fallen down and gotten up so many times in my life." Yes, Mary Kay Ash was very familiar with experience. One of her most famous and oft-repeated and re-Tweeted anecdotes is "We fail forward to success," most assuredly derived from all those instances when things did not go her way. Even with all the "failure" she experienced, Mary Kay went on to accomplish what no other woman in business has been able to match. Some of this success can surely be attributed to her hard work and willingness to make the sacrifices she needed to, but it also came from "knowing how to lose".

I can think of so many times when things didn't go the way that I wished for them to, or the way that I imagined them to, and I'm certain there were times when I was a really sore loser. But looking back on those times now, I know I'm stronger, wiser and more helpful to others who need advice and coaching than I would be had it not been for the experience, and I'm thankful to have had a role model in Mary Kay. I guess the real lesson I've learned is that my way may not be the best way after all, and I've learned to appreciate those times when things don't go my way, because I know that I'm going to grow as a result of the "experience."